My heart has been very heavy lately. God has been doing so much in the refining area of my heart over the last few years. On the outside I look very different than what I truly am, as with all of us. We all have a “face” that we put on. We have many different “faces” in our closet that when we are around certain people we need a different one. I am pretty sure no one feels they can truly be them selves even with someone who we think of as a close friend/spouse ect. We all have a fear wether big or small of not being excepted by other people. We all have that little voice that says ” if they only knew how you really felt, or thought ect.” We even have “our” closets in our hearts that we don’t even want our Lord to walk into. Those things we just can’t let go of. Those inner dreams or fears that we think make us who we are, or aren’t. We think if God walks into this room of my heart he will be disgusted with who I am.
BUT what if? What if, What if we let Him in? What if we let Jesus…
Those hurts, those dreams we think are dead and gone that we cannot let go of, those awful thoughts, those fears, our future! What if we give it all to HIM? I have had certain trials in my life that I thought I didn’t have a problem with, unit that trial happened… even when we think we are hiding certain things from God, reality is we are not. He knows everything about us, inside and out! Giving up 100% of us into Gods control is so hard for us, Why is that?
Why do we think we know better than God’s plans? Why do we think we can handle a situation better than God? Why do we think if we let God do it we won’t be happy?
Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
This is a pretty popular well know verse. Just like John 3:16. The thing about them both being so popular astounds me in a way that no one truly believes them. WE think “oh thats nice and great and all, BUT” theres always a but with us. Giving God that 100% control over our lives and letting him lead the way puts up a giant wall between us and this verse. We cannot have one foot in the worlds bucket and another in Gods and think we can walk and not fall…
Revelation 3:16 (KJV)
16 So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.
I don’t know about you, but I do not want God to spue me out of his mouth…. We either trust him or we don’t. I have been learning this the hard way all to often. I have had to grieve lost dreams and futures “I” have planned when they did not go as planned! Life has a way of doing that to us, ever wonder why? Maybe because that was not the PLANS God has for you? Even thought we have “free will” and often times our life trials are a direct result in a consequence of our own actions; God can still use those bad situations and turn them into something to his glory.
Romans 8:28 (KJV)
28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
What if we praised him in the storms instead of blaming him, or yelling at him? What if we truly meant “let your will be done” WHAT IF? God is not who we think he is in the form of the “great punisher” or “great judge” this non loving vengeful God. There is a song that has really touched my heart lately about this very thing of how we think God is. What if God wasn’t what you thought? What if you let God meet you where you are, in your guilt, shame and behind that discusting door in your heart…